Post from Martin
What follows is all the printed material that I had produced for the Celebration of Sue’s life I have placed it on this journal or web page for the people that were unable to attend the Celebration of Sue’s life. Or those like myself who would wish to reflect on her life. Obituary. Susan Margaret Belcher (Sue) Drifted away peacefully Monday 5 May 2008 Sue enjoyed 37 happy years in Wiltshire and Berkshire. She gave a warm, smiling welcome to visitors and patients at Wexham Park Hospital for 15 Years Sue will be loved and missed always by her husband Martin, her parents and sister, family and many close friends. Private family service at Slough Crematorium followed by a celebration of her life on Wednesday 14 May 4.30pm at St Margaret’s Church, Iver Heath, all welcome. No flowers please. Donations to 1st Iver Heath Scout Group c/o E Sargeant and Sons The Obituary was posted in the local papers with thanks to Martin Gibbons for helping me pull this together at a difficult time and under a pretty tight deadline. Order of Service Slough Crematorium Wednesday 14 May 2008 3.30PM 1) Verses 2) Opening Sentence and Prayers 3) Lord is my Sheppard The Lord's my shepherd, I'll not want.
He makes me down to lie
In pastures green, he leadeth me
The quiet waters by.
My soul he doth restore again,
And me to walk doth make
Within the paths of righteousness,
Even for his own name's sake.
Yea, though I walk in death's dark vale,
Yet will I fear no ill,
For thou art with me, and thy rod
And staff me comfort still.
My table thou hast furnished
In presence of my foes:
My head thou dost with oil anoint,
And my cup overflows.
Goodness and mercy all my life
Shall surely follow me,
And in God's house for evermore
My dwelling place shall be 4) Reading and short reflection 5) Lord of all Hopefulness Lord of all hopefulness, Lord of all joy,
Whose trust, ever child-like, no cares could destroy,
Be there at our waking, and give us, we pray,
Your bliss in our hearts, Lord, at the break of the day. Lord of all eagerness, Lord of all faith,
Whose strong hands were skilled at the plane and the lathe,
Be there at our labours, and give us, we pray,
Your strength in our hearts, Lord, at the noon of the day.
Lord of all kindliness, Lord of all grace,
Your hands swift to welcome, your arms to embrace,
Be there at our homing, and give us, we pray,
Your love in our hearts, Lord, at the eve of the day.
Lord of all gentleness, Lord of all calm,
Whose voice is contentment, whose presence is balm,
Be there at our sleeping, and give us, we pray,
Your peace in our hearts, Lord, at the end of the day. 6) “Miss Me But Let Me Go.” Martin Belcher When I come to the end of the day, And the sun has set for me, I want no rites in a gloom-filled room, Why cry for a soul set free? Miss me a little, but not for long, And not with your head bowed low. Remember the love we once shared, Miss me, but let me go For this is a journey we all must take, And each must go alone, It’s all a part of the Master’s plan A step on the road to home. When you are lonely and sick of heart, Go to the friends we know, And bury your sorrows in doing good deeds, Miss me, but let me go. by Robyn Rancman 7) Committal 8) Prayers of Thanks giving and Blessing I did not produce a printed order of service for the Crematorium service as both Hymns where to be found in the hymn books in the Chapel. It was only produced so that I had a clear understanding of what was happening. My Thanks go to Chaplin Paul Deeming for a wonderful service both at the Crematorium and the Church The following order of service is a what I presented to the Printers and the finished article was somewhat different due to layout etc. Sue Belcher 18 April 1971 – 5 May 2008 A celebration of Sue’s life 14 May 2008 St Margaret’s Church, Church Road, Iver Heath, Bucks v Entrance music “The Living Daylights” by A-ha v Introductions and opening Prayers v Hymn “Morning has Broken” Morning has broken, like the first morning,
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird.
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning,
Praise for them springing fresh from the Word.
Sweet the rain's new fall, sunlight from heaven,
Like the first dewfall, on the first grass;
Praise for the sweetness of the wet garden,
Sprung in completeness where His feet pass.
Mine is the sunlight, mine is the morning.
Born of the one light Eden saw play.
Praise with elation, praise every morning,
God's re-creation of the new day. v A reflection by Gerald Beddard I will at a later date on my return to the UK place a copy of Geralds relfelction here. This poem “The Golden Chain of Friendship” was originally read by Gerald at Sue and Martin’s Wedding on 13 August 1994 Friendship is like a golden chain
the links are friends so dear
And like a rare and precious jewel
It's treasured more each year It's clasped together firmly
With a love thats deep and true
And it's rich with happy memories
And fond recollections, too Time can't destroy its beauty
For as long as Memory lives
years can't erase the pleasure
that the joy of friendship gives For friendship is a priceless gift
That can't be bought or sold, But to have an understanding friend
Is worth far more than Gold And the golden chain of friendship
Is a strong and blessed tie
Binding kindred hearts together
As the years go passing by Helen Steiner Rice v An address by Anthony Codling, a friend and member of the Fewings family Anne, Sue’s sister will be marrying Anthony’s Brother Craig in July and although they were not married at the time. Sue had a very close relationship with Anthony and I was more than happy to be referring to Anthony as a member of the Fewings family. With Sue’s Family permission I would like to add a copy of their words here. v The Eulogy by Martin Belcher Eulogy for Sue I wanted to say a few words about the Sue I knew. My companion, wife and friend for 17 years. I first met Sue on a ‘Pamoja’ project. Pamoja is a Swahili word meaning ‘together’. We spent 18 months as a part of a team preparing for a community development trip in Kenya. As part of this preparation we had a team social evening ice skating. Sue really wanted to skate but was worried about falling over. So my first evening with Sue was spent holding her hand and dragging her round Swindon ice rink. Apparently she went home with a huge grin on her face. Sue had a passion for horses – particularly one called Gypsy. Horses are nervous creatures but also calm and strong when in the service of others – attributes that Sue certainly shared and perhaps why she loved horses so much. Sue showed a huge sense of caring, empathy and efficiency for 15 years at Wexham Park Hospital. One of Sue's greatest gifts was her welcoming smile. With her friendly manner she was able to calm the worried. Perhaps they were coming for the first appointment for something "scary" or were visiting a sick or injured friend. She may not have been sure what she did but she was expert at it. Sue knew many people and many that we both knew. If a friend had an appointment she always kept their confidence and never told me. It was never about herself – it was always about helping others and putting others first. Perhaps this helps explain why she kept her own illness from everybody for so long. Sue loved the simple things in life: - Making things out of play doh at her hospital bed
- Hot Springs and Snowball fights in New Zealand
- Dreaming of fairies
- Kitty her cat
- Singing along to Abba
- Swimming and Walking
- And simply just listening to people and working out what she could do to help
I have some lasting memories of Sue’s courage and determination over the last few months – far too many to mention. Many people will be aware of her on/off relationship with her NHS supplied wig after chemotherapy. She was very happy to wear it and also happy to fling it off when it itched or made her head too hot. The wig had a character of its own – it was even offered a saucer of milk by a close friend. Sue found this hilarious. Sue had many hidden strengths. Only just a month ago she stood up in front of a group of people and practised her speech for her sister’s wedding – 5 minutes of off-the-cuff, inspiring stories about a great friend. Unscripted and engaging – it showed a Sue that felt passionately about the people in her life and a courage and generosity that was uniquely Sue. Next we’ll hear a piece of music that means a lot to Sue and I. Sue and I listened to it in the hospital and it was the first piece of music myself and Sue’s parents heard after Sue’s passing. I hope it gives you a few minutes to reflect on how Sue touched your life. Thank you Although these where my words and thoughts my brother Paul was a great help in pulling them together, and I would like to thank him for all his help and support. v Music “Pretty Amazing Grace” by Neil Diamond v Paul Belcher reads “She is gone” You can shed tears that she is gone Or you can smile because she has lived You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left Your heart can be empty because you can't see her Or you can be full of the love that you shared You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday You can remember her and only that she is gone Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back Or you can do what she would want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on. David Harkins v Hymn “All Things Bright and Beautiful”
All things bright and beautiful,
All creatures great and small,
All things wise and wonderful,
The Lord God made them all.
Each little flower that opens,
Each little bird that sings,
He made their glowing colours,
He made their tiny wings.
The purple-headed mountains,
The river running by,
The sunset and the morning,
That brightens up the sky;
The cold wind in the winter,
The pleasant summer sun,
The ripe fruits in the garden,
He made them every one;
The tall trees in the greenwood,
The meadows where we play,
The rushes by the water,
To gather every day;
He gave us eyes to see them,
And lips that we might tell
How great is God Almighty,
Who has made all things well.
v Closing Prayers v Departure music “Dancing Queen” by ABBA In lieu of flowers donations can be made to '1st Iver Heath Scout Group' c/o E. Sargeant and Son, Church Street, Slough, SL1 1PJ or via a collection at the Church. The money collected will be shared with a number of charities as per Sue’s wishes. Thank you for wearing an item of pink clothing. Pink was Sue’s favourite colour and it was her wish that this service should be a celebration. To celebrate Sue’s Birthday Day. I would like to invite you to a Birthday Party kindly hosted by my sister Sarah Carter. My Sister and Brother in Law kindly offered the use of there house and kindly prepared all the food for what I called the “after show party” my thanks also go to Rod and Anne. I would also like to thank Sharon for helping sort the flowers in the Church and the Birthday Cake at Sue’s Party. Martin and Sharon also did a lot for Sue and myself in the final weeks at Wexham Park. And I would also like to thank Mark, Helen and Della for their support while Sue was in Swindon hospital. There are many that sent cards and good wishes to Sue while she was ill and to myself once she had drifted away. I would like to thank you all.
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suebelcher's journal
